Ungrateful

13 “But he answered one of them, ‘I am not being unfair to you, friend. Didn’t you agree to work for a denarius? 14 Take your pay and go. I want to give the one who was hired last the same as I gave you. 15 Don’t I have the right to do what I want with my own money? Or are you envious because I am generous?’

16 “So the last will be first, and the first will be last.”

Matthew 20:13-16

O: Parable of the hired hands in the vineyard. Men from the town was called to work in this vineyard. As the day progressed more and more workers were hired. Each worker was given the same waged. Those who worked earlier felt, as if they were entitled to more than the day's worth of work.

A: In this parable, grace is being taken fore-granted. Before this vineyard owner called the men from town to work at this vineyard, no one had the opportunity to make a days wage. Discontentment is prevalent from those who worked the longest. 

There are many applications that i can derived from this parable that Jesus' teaches. 
1. Be content with work I am given. Often times I'm looking over my shoulders and seeing those who are my age succeeding, making a ton of money. Jealously comes to me where I start losing focus on what matters most in this world. I start chasing the materialistic things. God ordained me to work at Magnachip for the current wage I am received. As I'm transitioning to another position, I need to do it with the right motive that I don't lose focus of the heavenly goal of reaching out to those lost.

2. Don't slack off. It is easy for me to do the bare minimum. If I was capable, I would have chosen to be those who were higher later in the day. To do the least amount of work and to get into heaven. I have to ask myself, am I serving for the right motivation and do enough as a servant of God? Do I love Jesus through the act of serving, or am I just working enough to get my denarius? Those are questions I need to improve on myself.

3. The most important aspect of what I received from this parable is... Grace... Like the master choosing the workers from the town, God has chosen me to work in his field. I did not deserve the opportunity to work, but He granted me a place for me to be at his side. I often grumble and find different avenues to show my discontentment when it comes to showing true thanksgiving. As Thanksgiving rolls out, I need to remember and constantly remember God is just. He is the one who is the one handing out the "wages" and who am I to complain or feel ungrateful for his free gift that I never deserved. 


and said: "Naked I came from my mother's womb, and naked I will depart. The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away; may the name of the LORD be praised." Job 1:21


He deserves all praise, glory and honor. I am nothing.

Jesus be praised. I am nothing compared to you. You give me salvation and I ALWAYS end up taking it forgranted. Please forgive me for taking your grace so lightly. Help me to act out of love for you and not just doing my "days work" to earn my stay, but to do so out of gratitude. I deserved nothing and everything was given because of your generosity. Help me to have a heart of thanksgiving. Whether I am cursed or blessed, let Your name be praised.

In Jesus Name
Amen. 

Pure Faith

27 “You will all fall away,” Jesus told them, “for it is written:

“‘I will strike the shepherd,
    and the sheep will be scattered.’[d]

28 But after I have risen, I will go ahead of you into Galilee.”

29 Peter declared, “Even if all fall away, I will not.”

30 “Truly I tell you,” Jesus answered, “today—yes, tonight—before the rooster crows twice[e] you yourself will disown me three times.”

31 But Peter insisted emphatically, “Even if I have to die with you, I will never disown you.” And all the others said the same.

71 He began to call down curses, and he swore to them, “I don’t know this man you’re talking about.”

72 Immediately the rooster crowed the second time.[h] Then Peter remembered the word Jesus had spoken to him:“Before the rooster crows twice[i] you will disown me three times.” And he broke down and wept.

Mark 14

Observation:
Out of all the stories of failures that are written in the Bible, the story of Peter denying Jesus is a story that I can most relate to. Peter was always a man that took action rather thinking the situation and calculating the consequences. Peter was gunho for Christ, leaving his work, family and responsibilities behind to follow Jesus. After three years of eating, sleeping and walking with Christ, the disciples would have went to the ends of the earth to follow their leader, but that wasn't the case. Talk is big, but that's where it ends.

Application:
Countless times have I dedicated my life of walking away from temptations and instead walking with God. And each of those times I claim that I have given my life up, I go running back to my false idols. Being here in the states, I feel privileged that my life is not in jeopardy. People have died for their belief in Jesus, yet when I am presented with an opportunity to share the Gospel, I shy away afraid to offend people, but also not to destroy my reputation. I'm essentially afraid to be labeled as a Jesus freak.

On the same hand, I can imagine Peter denying his association with Jesus to of all people, a little servant girl. Peter was deadly afraid of dying for Christ, just as he was so big on claiming he would lay his life down for him. During that time, he lacked pure faith.

Though my life isn't in turmoil of being taken away. I need to have more boldness when it comes to my association as a follower of Christ. Being labeled as a Jesus freak is something I need to cherish in my heart, rather than shun it as society would. If I am to be a fool, I need to choose to be a fool for Christ. As they say... there are people who show their emotions on their sleeves, I need to make my faith more evident and live everyday like its my last.

Jesus forgive me for not completely surrendering my life to you. As I claimed multiple times in my life that my life is no longer mine, but yours.. I ask that you would help me to recommit that desire. Help me to lose myself and have more boldness. Not only to stand up for you, but also to share in the goodnews in which you conquered sin once and for all. I pray for those brothers and sisters around the world who are suffering for their association with you. Help them to have boldness in the in face of adversaries that want to take their life. Give them to courage and the hope that you are walking with them.

In Jesus Name
Amen

Commited to the Lord

19 Then some Jews came from Antioch and Iconium and won the crowd over. They stoned Paul and dragged him outside the city, thinking he was dead. 20 But after the disciples had gathered around him, he got up and went back into the city. The next day he and Barnabas left for Derbe.

The Return to Antioch in Syria

21 They preached the gospel in that city and won a large number of disciples. Then they returned to Lystra, Iconium and Antioch, 22 strengthening the disciples and encouraging them to remain true to the faith. “We must go through many hardships to enter the kingdom of God,” they said. 23 Paul and Barnabas appointed elders[a] for them in each church and, with prayer and fasting, committed them to the Lord, in whom they had put their trust. 24 After going through Pisidia, they came into Pamphylia, 25 and when they had preached the word in Perga, they went down to Attalia.

Acts 14:22-23

The story of Paul and Barnabas being in Lystra shows the fickleness of mens' hearts. P & B were claimed as Greek gods by the masses, but a few Jews from different regions corrected them and turned their beliefs on P & B. Paul never claimed to be God, but only mere humans. Regardless these two were dragged outside and stoned, only to return shortly after stopping by another city. No fear.

Paul understood what it meant to suffer for Christ. I'm sure he felt every stone being thrown at him whether it broke bones or not, Paul persevered for the sake of advancing the gospel. If hardships indicate living for Christ, I have definitely been a fan rather than a follower. I most likely would have avoided Lystra, as if I even stepped foot in that city, it would have been certain death. Paul and Barnabas knew that power came from God and had 100% faith that He was walking with them. No doubt came to their mind that they would be taken away. I have to remember that my life is ending only when God allows it. Not sooner or later. If I am to do God's work, I must do it without fear.

A great litmus test is to see if I am suffering in Christ name. Right now I feel like life is too easy and I'm too focus on myself.

Jesus, help me to see the bigger picture. Help me to give up my own agendas and live for you without abandon. Forgive me Jesus for not having 100% faith in you. More than none, I live for myself and you are the last thing on my mind. I pray you help me ingrain myself in you.

In Jesus Name
Amen. 

Sin No More & Love One Another

¹⁶ This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers and sisters. ¹⁷ If anyone has material possessions and sees a brother or sister in need but has no pity on them, how can the love of God be in that person? ¹⁸ Dear children, let us not love with words or speech but with actions and in truth.

1 John 3:16-18

John states that if we are in Christ we should sin no more. I am called to live in love and truth.

⁷ Dear children, do not let anyone lead you astray. The one who does what is right is righteous, just as he is righteous. ⁸ The one who does what is sinful is of the devil, because the devil has been sinning from the beginning. The reason the Son of God appeared was to destroy the devil’s work. ⁹ No one who is born of God will continue to sin, because God’s seed remains in them; they cannot go on sinning, because they have been born of God.

When I accepted Christ as my savior, he called me to be Born Again. To shed my hate-fill, sinful life and replace it with one of love. If God is truly in me, then I am to no longer sin again. Granted I can't be perfect on my own will or strength, but perfection is achieved through Christ. Christ is the one who came to destroy the devil's work and to free all of us from the bondage of sin.

I have to ask myself.. Am I living like Christ did his work, or am I still clinging onto life as the devil is still it's ruler. My sins need to be addressed. More importantly, rather than my words, I am called to love in action. Jesus reminds that those who love him, will love onto others as well. I need to make more of an effort to listen to the spurring of the spirit rather than suppressing the ankling of the heart.

Jesus I can do all things when you give me strength. Help me to overcome my addictions mainly the sin of lust. Help me to speak truth and not slander. Help me to obey the spirit rather than suppress it.

In Jesus Name
Amen.

Walking in the Light

5 This is the message we have heard from him and declare to you: God is light; in him there is no darkness at all. 6 If we claim to have fellowship with him and yet walk in the darkness, we lie and do not live out the truth. 7 But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies us from all[b] sin.

1 John 1:5-7


God is pure without sin. God is absolute without any flaw. I as man, I tend to forget who God really is, an omnipotent, omnipresent being. I treat Him lightly, always putting him in the back of my mind. I bring him down to my level to justify my actions of being impure and committing sins without hesitation. And I get caught up in the whole cycle of committing the sin through the week, then coming to God in repentance on Sunday after hearing Pastor Bob speak. The conviction only lasts for the day then I go back to walking in darkness. Essentially I forget GOD IS LIGHT. 

John states that we must quit lying to ourselves and live out the truth, as light and dark cannot mix. If we do not live in light, we cannot be forgiven and purified, in order to fellowship with God and the saints. During the counts that Jesus walked the earth, he forgives people and tells them, "sin no more". If I am to be forgiven through Christ's blood, I MUST SIN NO MORE. Yet I'm still repeating the same sin, struggling to let go because sinning. Granting there is guilt afterwards, but I have such a short memory, it slips my mind. Whether it's lust, deceit, slander or even murder [in my heart],  I need to change and surrender. 

I recently watched a youtube video during my research on calisthenics and it this guy talks about his testimony. Rather inspiring... He says even though he was so consumed in sin, he broke down and surrendered himself to Jesus. That's when even temptations of lust had a hold in his life, he no longer desired it. Supernatural indeed. He even recounts a person with homosexual tendencies, as he fell away from that lifestyle after meeting Jesus.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Lm47zVvYhA

Rather than accepting the fact that I'm a sinner and I cannot change, I need surrender myself to Christ and let go. I know I can't do it myself through my own willpower, but it really needs to be through the redeeming power of Christ to conquer even the deepest of sins that I'm addicted to.

Jesus I don't know if I can surrender myself wholely to you. Give me the desire to do so. That I can let go of everything and live without reserve. In my mind and spirit, I want to surrender to you, but my flesh resists. Drives these demons out of me and help me to live in reckless abandon for you. Help me to overcome my flesh and to live more in the spirit.

In Jesus Name Amen. 

Troubled Heart

They will have no fear of bad news;
    their hearts are steadfast, trusting in the Lord.
8 Their hearts are secure, they will have no fear;
    in the end they will look in triumph on their foes.

The wicked will see and be vexed,
    they will gnash their teeth and waste away;
    the longings of the wicked will come to nothing.

Psalms 112:7-8,10



When I examine my heart, can I say that I fully trust that it's 100% secure in the Lord? Do I still have unresolved sin?

All I can say is yes. Over the last few months alone and even sooner, I have cheated a system, lied, slandered, and stolen... All without a blink of the eye. I certain do feel vexed knowing that my life is coming closer to an end. 

God help me reconciled, recommit and come to a repentance. Though it's a daily struggle, I know when I ask for forgiveness, I am to sin no more, but I can't help but keep sinning. It's hard for me to change my ways and God I just ask that you help me turn 180deg. Help me to be like Zacchaeus the tax collector and pay back those I owe 110%, to give everything up and run after you. Help me to be obedient.

In Jesus Name
Amen. 

Stubbornness of the Heart

11 “Now therefore say to the people of Judah and those living in Jerusalem, ‘This is what the Lord says: Look! I am preparing a disaster for you and devising a plan against you. So turn from your evil ways, each one of you, and reform your ways and your actions.’ 12 But they will reply, ‘It’s no use. We will continue with our own plans; we will all follow the stubbornness of our evil hearts.’”

Jeremiah 18:11-12

Jeremiah is trying to convince the Israelites to turn back from their wicked ways and recommit to God. To no avail they make an excuse saying "it's no use" and continue to follow their evil hearts.

Lately I've been struggling with the quality of people's heart. Church, small group or any form of activities that we do, to me seems fake and such a waste of time. Whats the purpose of doing church when we're not genuine..?

I had a spiritual conversation with a brother today regarding why I don't attend CG as often, as I should. Granted I do have so much on my table regarding my test as well as serving at church and at my brothers, but there's apart of me that feels bitter at the apathy that is place in church. I get frustrated because I don't see change. I feel like there's so much fakeness.. People saying the right things or doing the right thing, but missing the point of why we come to church. I feel like these meetings are a waste because the deeper issues aren't being addressed. We have the same program or spiritual cycle that goes on and goes year after year. People coming for the wrong reasons (ie meeting sig. others, fellowship etc) and not enough of surrendering to God. At times.. I feel like what I rather would have is an organic cell group... rather than meeting up as members of the body once a week, be more like friends. Don't meet because we need to but because we want to...

Well enough of me ranting on about this... the deeper issue is myself.

Indeed I am the biggest culprit as well. Before I start talking bad about church and how their not surrendering... I need to examine myself.. I am the one with the bigger plank... I know this feeling of hopelessness comes from the evil one instilling stubbornness in my heart. I wish, I pray for change.

God forgive me for being complacent in your work. Forgive me for judging those around me rather than examining my own heart. Help me to be more proactive about my faith to instill a change within the hearts of fellow brothers and sisters around me. Thank you for bring this up into light. Protect me from the evil one.

In Jesus Name
Amen

Knowing God

16 “All this I have told you so that you will not fall away. 2 They will put you out of the synagogue; in fact, the time is coming when anyone who kills you will think they are offering a service to God. 3 They will do such things because they have not known the Father or me. 

John 16:1

• Jesus explains to the disciples the difference between someone who knows God and doesn't.
• We tend to do what we thing is right rather than what God intended it. Though we're not murdering Christians, our own agendas causes me to miss the mark.
• Therefore I am sinning since I am disobeying.
• The bigger importance is to know God/Jesus/Holy Spirit rather than acting on our own.

Rather than understand what God wants in my life, I often times try to accomplish things in His name. I go and do charity or service work thinking that God will be honored without the right understanding of who God is and his characters. There is an importance of knowing who Christ is. When I'm just out there serving thinking that God will be please without having the fellowship of knowing who God is.. My actions are meaningless. I am doing a disservice to God. My priority should be to know God while doing his work, rather than doing work empty based on what I feel is the right thing to do. 

Help me God to come back to you. Help me to know you again. I pray that you would allow a greater understanding and a deeper desire for Jina and I to know you more.

In Jesus Name 

Amen

Turning Back

²⁰ Then the Spirit of God came on Zechariah son of Jehoiada the priest. He stood before the people and said, “This is what God says: ‘Why do you disobey the Lord’s commands? You will not prosper. Because you have forsaken the Lord, he has forsaken you.’”

2 Chronicles 24 

Joash did what was noble and good during his early reign as king. He did not fail to act upon the instructions of Jehoiada, the chief priest. Once Jehoiada died, Joash fell away from the covenant that Judah would be for God. Zachariah, son of the chief priest, confronts Joash and tells him that he needs to turn away and return back to God. This angers Joash and murders Zachariah as a result.

When the eyes of authority was upon Joash he did what was expected. Following the rules and what was expected of someone who was placed in the position of influence. Once Jehoiada died, Joash became corrupted by other officials and fell away from the faith, and even to the point of committing great sin of murdering an innocent man. I can completely relate myself to Joash. When eyes were upon me, I felt obligated to act holy and do that was expected. Since I served on Wednesdays and on Sundays, it became natural for me to "act" holy, but honestly speaking, I can't say if my heart was in it at times. And now that my role has been decreased at church or even in the spotlight to visible eyes of the Body,  I feel less inclined to pick up the bible and read the word. Furthermore my prayer life is lacking and even praying for meals brings me guilt.

I think what really stirred me up to start journaling was the fear of God turning his back on me. I sense this urge that satan is on my back creeping in, changing my perspective and even allowing me to think that I'll be possessed. In away this might be true... Maybe this is God's way of bring me back to Him. The fear that without him, I'll be subjugated to the hold satan has in my life. Losing myself to the world and the world's ideals.

Simply speaking... I need to prioritize and really put God first. No more excuses of busyness.

God forgive me for being like Joash and rejecting you. I pray that you would continually give me this feeling of fear, so that I would use that to come closer to you. Forgive me for my sins and falling short. I blatantly sin against you without any remorse. I just pray that you would convict me to do the right thing when my faith is being tested.

In Jesus Name
Amen

Child like

Matthew 19:13-15 NIV

Then people brought little children to Jesus for him to place his hands on them and pray for them. But the disciples rebuked them.  Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.”  When he had placed his hands on them, he went on from there.

O:
Characteristics of children and why God cares for children
*children have pure faith. 
*children are innocent and not corrupted by the world's beliefs or influences
*children are easily believing
*children do not have other motives and also not quick to judge. 
*children are simple.  Know what's good and bad and don't have gray areas

A:
Jesus said that we are to have childlike faith and only then we are capable of entering heaven.  I find it difficult that we are called to be like children especially when I've been so corrupted with the world.  The world tells us not to be gullible and to be ruthless in all our endeavors. We are not to trust anyone and to backstab if necessary. It goes against what God tells us.  And as corrupted beings we fail to listen like children. I understand why Jesus loved children so much.  They are malleable.
How do I become more childlike?

P:God forgive me for being disobedient. I know you call me to be like  a child but honestly I don't know how. By saying I should depend on  the Holy spirit seems so cliché. Help me to find a deeper meaning behind what you call us to be.  Help me to be like a child.  No judging but loving and believing.
In jesus
Amen

Faith like a Child

18 At that time the disciples came to Jesus and asked, “Who, then, is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven?”

² He called a little child to him, and placed the child among them. ³ And he said: “Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. ⁴ Therefore, whoever takes the lowly position of this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. ⁵ And whoever welcomes one such child in my name welcomes me.

Matthew 18:1-5

O: 

• Greatest in the kingdom of heaven is Children
• Because of their innocent and pure faith
• Adults have too many doubts and we rationalize rather than blindly follow Jesus
• Children had no rights in this society
• If we are to be like children as Jesus calls us, we must sacrifice our rights

A:

• Not sure exactly how I'll achieve childlike faith, but it has been a reoccurring theme that I've been reading in the last couple of days.
• Pray more and rely on God's province rather than taking matters into my own hand

P:

 Jesus help me to have a childlike faith. Help me to follow you without questioning where we're going or what will happen to me. I need to learn to surrender all that I have and really lay myself at your every command. As we learned in CG... Help me to serve the poor, and widowed. Help me to have the heart.

In Jesus Name
Amen

Cheerful Giver

⁶ Remember this: Whoever sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and whoever sows generously will also reap generously. ⁷ Each of you should give what you have decided in your heart to give, not reluctantly or under compulsion,for God loves a cheerful giver. ⁸ And God is able to bless you abundantly, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work. 

2 Cor 9:6-8

Paul reminds the church of Corinth to continue strong and give to the church in Jerusalem (noted in 2 Cor 8:10). He wants to make sure that these financial gifts are given with a cheerful heart and not of one that is of obligation or thrown together last minute. Taken from what Paul urges the Church in Corinth; When giving, the heart is the most important factor in the gift. Whether it's alot or little, God is pleased when we give with love.

When it comes to giving back to God, I've been such a failure. It's been so long since I've tithed or rather if I did tithe it was always out of obligation or a duty. There is a lack of wanting to give back with a heart of gratitude. Partially because there is no response back to when I give. I don't see where the money goes to nor how it affects the kingdom. I know i give out of faith knowing that the money that is used is going to be put into use to further God's kingdom. Aside from just giving financially... Giving my time up as a offering as also been difficult. There are so many opportunities at church to serve, yet i struggle with sacrificing my own time to give back in doing God's work. I realize, I have become a consumer just feeding off whatever is given at church. As a result my faith has been suffering as well. There's no more desire to seek after God nor is there any to want to grow. I have become lukewarm... This week... I need to focus and pray so that when I do tithe, its out of gratitude for what Christ has already done on the cross. My possessions are no longer mine, and they are a small price I trade in for the priceless debt Jesus paid for me. 

Help me God to count my blessings. Help me to realize what you've done on the cross. Make the scandal of grace real, so that I feel the pleasure and joy of serving you and giving back to you. I have been so self centered lately... I just pray that you help me get out of this rut.

IN JESUS NAME AMEN!

Spirit's Power

2 And so it was with me, brothers and sisters. When I came to you, I did not come with eloquence or human wisdomas I proclaimed to you the testimony about God.^[a] 2 For I resolved to know nothing while I was with you except Jesus Christ and him crucified. ³ I came to you in weakness with great fear and trembling. ⁴ My message and my preaching were not with wise and persuasive words, but with a demonstration of the Spirit’s power, ⁵ so that your faith might not rest on human wisdom, but on God’s power.

1 Corinthians 2:1-5

Observation:

• Paul is a Pharisee trained from childhood to speak, argue and be articulate in presenting ideas.
• As Saul, he led the persecution of the early church and convicted Christians to death.
• After knowing Christ, Paul admits that all his worth is rubbish. V4 "My message and my preaching were not with wise". 
• Coming from man who persecuted those that Christ love and finally meets his maker on the road to Damascus. 
• How shameful and broken Paul must have felt. He thought he was doing the right thing, but the whole time he was breaking Christ's heart through his own understanding of the Word of God. He missed the mark and message God had from the beginning of time.
• Finally receives wisdom that comes from God. 
• A man who finally understands what it means to come in weakness.

Application:

Many times I come to Christ in pride and self confidence. When I serve on the praise team or in any other forms of ministry at church, I forget about God and use my own abilities to accomplish the task at hand. The goal is evident... To bring closer the hearts of those I serve to God. Yet when I take God out of the equation, only glorify myself. Paul had every right to be proud of his heritage and his ability to speak. Paul had the knowledge to refute and debate against the best of thinkers as shone in the times when he was in the Greek Providences of Corinth. But more important... God humbles Paul and shows him that his abilities comes from the Lord. My ability to work, serve and love all come from Holy Spirit. That is the true wisdom that is hidden from those who don't know Christ. 

Prayer:

God help me to be more in tuned with the Spirit. You are within me, yet I drive you out so easily to accomplish my own agendas. When you tug, and encourage me to walk in the steps you would walk - help me to listen and obey. Forgive me for having pride in my own abilities and help me to be more Christlike in the ways that I would be intuned with you God. Allow more prayer and reading of the WORD, so that I can be closer to you God. More important break my pride in myself.

In Jesus Name
Amen

No longer Calloused

32 The Reubenites and Gadites, who had very large herds and flocks, saw that the lands of Jazer and Gilead were suitable for livestock. ² So they came to Moses and Eleazar the priest and to the leaders of the community, and said,³ “Ataroth, Dibon, Jazer, Nimrah, Heshbon, Elealeh, Sebam, Nebo and Beon— ⁴ the land the Lord subdued before the people of Israel—are suitable for livestock, and your servants have livestock. ⁵ If we have found favor in your eyes,” they said, “let this land be given to your servants as our possession. Do not make us cross the Jordan.”

⁶ Moses said to the Gadites and Reubenites, “Should your fellow Israelites go to war while you sit here? ⁷ Why do you discourage the Israelites from crossing over into the land the Lord has given them? ⁸ This is what your fathers did when I sent them from Kadesh Barnea to look over the land. ⁹ After they went up to the Valley of Eshkol and viewed the land, they discouraged the Israelites from entering the land the Lord had given them. ¹⁰ The Lord’s anger was arousedthat day and he swore this oath: ¹¹ ‘Because they have not followed me wholeheartedly, not one of those who were twenty years old or more when they came up out of Egypt will see the land I promised on oath to Abraham, Isaac and Jacob— ¹² not one except Caleb son of Jephunneh the Kenizzite and Joshua son of Nun, for they followed the Lordwholeheartedly.’ ¹³ The Lord’s anger burned against Israel and he made them wander in the wilderness forty years, until the whole generation of those who had done evil in his sight was gone.

Numbers 32:11

Observation

• Israelites we're once again willing to settle and not take back the land in which God commanded them.
• Settling for the Israelites was a direct disobedience to God
• God wipes out the generation that didn't follow God whole heartedly. 

Application / Reflection

• I too fail at following God whole heartedly. I give him lip service and do things for the sake of doing things. 
• Out of the millions of Israelites that were wandering the desert, only Caleb and Joshua were the only ones who followed God. 2 out of a million!
• Live up to my name. Be like Joshua in a world full of apathy. Get excited for Christ and live it out.

Prayer

God forgive me for not taking my relationship with you seriously. Like the Israelites, you have promised me inheritance which is far greater than this world can offer, yet I settle for what is easy and whats infront of me... A comfortable life doing the 9-5 and serving at church without a change in my heart. Serving at churh has become nothing more than a pat on the back and I ask you would change that. Allow my heart to be in it completely. Help me to see what you see, hear what you hear, be at a place where you would be and love those who you love. Break my heart God for what breaks yours. I don't want to be calloused to these things anymore. I want to be genuine.

I want to love you more God.

In Jesus Name
Amen

Jesus the Compassionate High Priest

⁴⁵ “Anyone with such a defiling disease must wear torn clothes, let their hair be unkempt,^[c] cover the lower part of their face and cry out, ‘Unclean! Unclean!’ ⁴⁶ As long as they have the disease they remain unclean. They must live alone; they must live outside the camp.

Leviticus 13:45-46

In the old testament times, priest were not only officiators of religious rituals, but were also considered physicians that performed various examinations. Spiritual and physical well-being were one in the same in early Jewish society. (This would make sense, since physical ailments and diseases came to being once sin entered the world through during the fall of Adam.) According to the book of Leviticus, those who were unclean were shun from society. Whether this was to prevent the further spreading of the disease, or if God was punishing them through the sickness, society labeled the sick, as ones whom were "unclean". The unclean were at the mercy of the priests, as once they were clean, they would have the opportunity to reintegrate back into society after priest deems so.

Because of Christ's death on the cross, we no longer need worry about the approval of a priest to be accepted back into society. Christ accepted me as I am and will always accept regardless of how sinful I am. I do not need to cry out unclean... which I totally should, since I so wretched, but Christ transfers all the pus, sores and filth I'm covered in, to himself, so that I will have a clean bill of health to enter his kingdom. He has compassion on me, though I deserve non of it. And likewise I need to reciprocate that compassion to those around me.

In the next coming days, my mom will be going to Denver to help my brother move back to San Jose. These are some frustrating times for me because of my resentment towards my brother of always failing to stand on his own two feet. Though I know that his situation is caused by his mental disability, I feel like that isn't always the case. I'm a harsh critic because I know he needs to be responsible and want him to be that older brother for me. Someone I can look up to... The money I give to my mother somehow always gets diverted back to my brother. But from what I read and meditated on through today's scripture.. I feel so wrong and wretched for thinking that I'm any better. Christ accepts me for who I am and I need to show compassion and grace towards my brother. Christ cleansed my body from these sores, and who am I to shun my brother from the family? ...


Jesus forgive me for losing patience. Help me to have compassion for my brother. There are some deep seeded hurt that still remains in my heart, but I know that you will heal those hurts and make things whole. I pray that you be with my brother and his sickness. Allow him to be healed and no longer be reliant on any drugs. I pray you bring peace in his life and help him to function on his own. Give him grace God... Help him to find you.

In Jesus Name
Amen

Walking away from sin

Psalms 19:13-14 NIV84

Keep your servant also from willful sins; may they not rule over me. Then will I be blameless, innocent of great transgression. May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O Lord , my Rock and my Redeemer.

In David's psalms, he asks God's help that he would not fall into temptation. The sin that he commits is a willful act rather than one of unmerited compulsion. He closes out the song with a statement... I may my words and meditations be pleasing to you (God)

For too long I've been walking in sin. The prayers that the sin not rule over mean have stopped. I know in my heart that sinning is not right, but when I'm so consumed in myself the act of sin does not even phase me with guilt. But this sunday, while doing the Lords supper I was convicted by God to come back. I know the things I've been thinking and saying have not been pleasing in Gods sight. Lately I've been having negative thoughts of people. Feelings that cause me to be cynical. I've been a harsh critic on those around me. The joy in which I received from the Lord is gone but the only thing that remains is the feeling of meaninglessness of life's struggle. And This is also what I feel about church... I know this is satan's doing. To make myself seem greater than I am by judging them. I need to pray about this.... I am not greater. And I have no right to measure others when I myself am struggling in my spiritual life.

Jesus break my pride. Cleanse me from sin and willfully walking into sin. I am not greater than anyone else but when I walk with my head up thinking that I know best about everything around me... It really dampers my relationship with you. I pray you make me humble and find peace. I want that desire to seek you all the more fervently. In Jesus name Amen.

The first shall become last

Luke 22:25-27 NIV Jesus said to them, "The kings of the Gentiles lord it over them; and those who exercise authority over them call themselves Benefactors. But you are not to be like that. Instead, the greatest among you should be like the youngest, and the one who rules like the one who serves. For who is greater, the one who is at the table or the one who serves? Is it not the one who is at the table? But I am among you as one who serves.

Jesus came to this earth not to rule but to serve mankind. Jesus did not assume authority over all, which he could have been being God himself, but instead humbled himself as a servant to all. Jesus lived out his life as he taught and likewise we need to follow.

finally being 30 years old, desire to be well off has been greater than ever. I'm not sure how much longer I have in this world, but I need to put my life in perspective being a Christ follower. Like he said... We are to serve as serving is greater than being served. The world standard is not what God intended our lives to be. It's great to be blessed monetarily but that does not mean that I sit back and squander gods blessing for myself. Service whether by material acts or gifts should be used to help our brothers and sisters. In the end... To love on others is the best thing to do.

Jesus help me to live my life more meaningful in the acts of service rather than taking the role just receiving. Help me to be a person that seeks out the heavenly riches rather than the earthly ones that rot away. Give me the desire God to forego my sinful nature of wanting to be on top for my own comfort. In the end it is you i want to please as those gifts do not rot away but I can take it with me once I die.

In Jesus name amen

God and Money

¹³ “No servant can serve two masters. Either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and Money.”

Luke 16:13

Jesus gives a parable about a manager and how he deals with money. Knowing that his time at his job is coming to an end, the manager deals with all the people who owe his master money and settle debts. I'm not sure whether or not the people who owed his master money were going to pay anytime soon, but he gave incentives to them to pay up and also gain friendship. 

Jesus says

 ⁹ I tell you, use worldly wealth to gain friends for yourselves, so that when it is gone, you will be welcomed into eternal dwellings.

Rather than being so consumed with money, the manager did what he can to gain favoritism. Money did not dictate his actions, but used it to make friends. Likewise when I gain money, I mustn't be so consumed with gaining more and being worldly successful, but focus on using that money to build connections and further his kingdom. Lately i've been struggling with the drive for success and at times it has been consuming me. I know money isn't a bad thing, but the struggles that come with gaining material wealth has its issues too.

Father help me to focus more on you. Help me to seek you first and your kingdom. I know I haven't been tithing as regularly so I pray that you'd help me to be more responsible in giving back to you. In your name I pray

Amen

Father's Business

⁴⁹ “Why were you searching for me?” he asked. “Didn’t you know I had to be in my Father’s house?”^[f] 50 But they did not understand what he was saying to them.

Luke 2:49

The word house is another word for business. In otherwords, "didn't you know I had to be in my father's business". The "Father" mentioned in this passage refers to the heavenly father and not Joseph. When Joseph and Mary approached Jesus, they were confused because they did not know what Jesus was referring to. It was almost like Jesus had a compulsion to be with God the Father in his response to his Parents. There was a sense of confidence in his words that he wouldn't be anywhere else, but discussing scripture and learning from the other Rabbi's regarding God's Words. 

Though Jesus had a duty of obedience to his earthly parents, he did not neglect what was important in finding fellowship with God himself. Jesus was so intuned with God, that he lost track of time, even to the point of being left behind for 2 days without seeing his parents. Though its not so much of a stretch to serve where I can, I miss out on the more important matters of being ingrained in the Father's business. God's business is in the act of changing lives and bringing them to salvation. It has certainly been a while since I've done this.. To be involved in "my Father's business". I need to find more opportunities to share the Gospel to non-believers

Jesus forgive me for keeping your word to myself. Holy spirit lead me to spiritual conversations in which can lead to changing of lives and ultimately salvation through your precious blood. 

In Jesus Name
Amen